Hillary Clinton and Laura Bush in bump and grind showdown
By DEREK CLONTZ
Your World Report
A sex shop owner has challenged first lady Laura Bush and presidential
hopeful Sen. Hillary Clinton to compete in a “bump and grind showdown” for a
children’s charity.
And while it seems unlikely that either woman
will participate in such a tawdry spectacle, insiders in both camps are
“hoping against hope” that the most recognizable women in American
politics will slip into thongs and pasties - or at least one-piece bathing suits - and go
at it live, on satellite TV, for everyone on the planet to see.
“Laura isn’t the dowdy old party
pooper that people think she is and this could be a kind of ‘coming out‘ party
for her,” a Beltway insider with ties to both women told me exclusively.
“Anybody who knows Hillary will tell you
that she’s never been one to shy away from a good time and besides, this would give
her a chance to show Bill what he’s been missing.
“With all his womanizing, he seems to have
forgotten that Hillary is a brilliant, beautiful and sexy woman
who’s getting prettier as she gets older.
“The same goes for Mrs. Bush. It’s true
that people perceive her as being prim and proper to a fault. But when the first lady lets
her hair down, watch out - she’s a wildcat.“
Treight’s Triple X Theater owner Roger
Treight says he hit on the idea of a bump-and-grind showdown involving big-name lady
politicians after watching a documentary on poverty in the United States.
“When I heard that over 30 percent of
American children are living in poverty it made me sick to my stomach,“ says the Los
Angeles-based businessman. “I thought, ‘How can this be? Why are we letting our
kids go to school hungry?‘
“I started thinking of ways to draw
attention to the problem and raise money at the same time. It occurred to me that Mrs.
Bush and Mrs. Clinton are among the best-known women on earth, and with all that
power and celebrity, they’re headliners in anybody’s book.
“And then it hit me: ‘If Hillary and
Laura were competing in a dance contest, everybody would pay good money to see
them.’
“We’re not talking about some cheesy
back-room amateur night at a topless club. We‘re talking the ultimate pay-for-view
for the best cause I can think of - our children.”
Treight says he telephoned “a few friends in
high places” who in turn contacted Sen. Clinton, 59, and Mrs. Bush, 60. No
official word yet on whether they’ll agree to what he’s already calling
“Hillary’s & Laura’s Dance Showdown.”
But Washington is buzzing with the possibilities.
“I’ve got my fingers crossed,“
says a Clinton aide who requested anonymity. “This would be bigger than a
presidential debate and a heck of a lot more interesting.”
Adds a Bush insider: “I think the first lady
might go for it. The wild card is President Bush. If he thinks the faceoff would offend
conservative voters, he’ll nix the plan.
“Of course, if that happens I wouldn’t
put it past Hillary to go solo and then make political hay over
Laura’s forfeit.”
In Las Vegas, bookmakers are taking the proposed
faceoff very seriously, with Hillary considered a 3 to 1 favorite to win - if they dance.
“Hillary’s got the edge but the first
lady isn’t exactly chopped liver,“ says one bookie. “If she takes this
seriously, and she really commits to the idea of helping those children, she could be
a sleeper.”
Question? Comment? What do you think? Write Your
World Report Editor Derek Clontz . He reads and responds personally to every
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